...

since when did i stop looking forward to relaxing but instead to hurry up and finish my work so i can move on to something else..?

they don't know how to stop'm

wish i were unstoppable,

can i have my battery back, please? i gotta keep runnin runnin ruuunning.

I hate being compared to

Yet I compare myself to other people so much. Hypocritical.

I don't know what I wanna hear. When I hear things like, comparing yourself to others will only trap you, I feel like maybe I am being too hard on myself and I should loosen up on the pressure. But at the same time, I feel like they don't believe in me; they don't believe that I can do better or just as well. And it kindof worsens the conditions, because that's ONE MORE PERSON for me to WANT to prove wrong.

I really hope I don't disappoint myself. I want to be able to go, "In your face."

Sometimes I wonder if my standards are my own, or of others.

and at this very moment,

I feel invincible.
As if, what can't I do?

I wish to preserve this feeling in a special place forever, so whenever I'm feeling weak, I can get it back out.
Too bad, wishes don't come true half the time..

But I love this feeling. I love it. Love it, love it, love this feeling of accomplishment. Please, let it stay for a purpose, let this feeling be convincing, let this feeling be real. Until I really am invincible. Please.

about the last blog..

What am I saying?
Just reading it made me feel like a brat. Compared to last year, I should be so much more grateful for this year. Sure, maybe there was more work--but who isn't working hard? Sure, maybe I received more pressure from myself about the future, more stress, more studying etc etc, but I'm not the only one. I'm in no position to complain.
And compared to last year, I think I feel a lot happier and more grateful for everyday I manage to get by..

So idk what I'm thinking when I say it "hasnt been the best" but although it wasnt the best, it was definitely better, and it has been quite okay with those memorable days.
I sound as if I'm complaining, so I hereby apologize to myself.

i wanna be the sunshine to your rainy day

Sophomore year definitely hasn't been the best for me.

But those rare memories, I will remember forever.

For once, I'm not lying 'boutchu

^This is called a self-taken photoshoot, not conceited camerawhoring :).

Forgot about you again, little blogspot.


Well, my Spring Break was wonderfully fabulous, check the facebook/tumblr for pictures. Had a blast with some of the most splendacious people in the world. No, that's not a word, but that's how indescribable they are (=. Happy super late birthday to Stacy, Danica, and Emily. You guys were definitely the highlight of my breaaak!

STAR testing is always a chill week in terms of classes. Well, I'm different, I always manage to find a way to make myself explode. Not a good thing.

I am fearing the future again. Time is going by faster. SATs. I still haven't registered.
My topbiggest worry now is not getting into AP Psych next year. Not enough people for 2 sections, too many for one, so she suggesed AP European History. NOT. INTERESTED. I actually want psychology. Especially now, I think I've set my target. And in bio, learning about the brain and all, I realize, yeah, this is the thing I'm interested in. ._.

Ushdigshgidsgdsdshhd.
I'm really gonna run out of time..